March 2020 will be remembered. And not nicely. Perhaps it was on Friday the 13^th that you and I, living comfortably in the United States (note, I speak and write from Vermont which is not representative of the US as a whole) first accepted the reality of the Coronavirus pandemic.*

Unfortunately, Friday the 13^th has been dusted off and redefined. Some of you, of course, had been prescient, or at least paying attention, and had been stocking up on food and emergency supplies. Others were reluctant – even a few who continue to doubt and insist on throwing the flu into the mix. Be that as it may, as I write this, we are beginning week 3 of The New Normal and I am compelled to keep my blog posts alive. So here goes.

To all those who are deemed ESSENTIAL, thank you. The Big Picture is not pretty. I don’t know about you, but I find it heart-wrenching to consider those unable to be with a loved one who is terminally ill; or to be that loved one dying alone; or to worry about keeping one’s family safe and fed, and wonder just how far one can hold out on limited resources. Dire indeed. For generations to come acts of generosity and selflessness will be passed from parent to child. We watch press conferences and see our State and Local leaders working on our behalf and looking exhausted. And we realize that community is not a geographical designation.

To those of us who are NON-ESSENTIAL, well, I guess it’s nice to know! The Big Picture is one thing but the Thumbnail is also compelling.  I can walk out my door and into the woods without seeing another person. How on earth do people manage exile within their own homes or to be living in an apartment dwelling with multiple floors separating their room(s) from ground level.

Screen time is UP. My guess is that after the initial binge-watching of Netflix, much of screen time is spent on news and connection. It is, after all, a time to reach out to an ever-expanding virtual community and know that we are not alone. One can only hope that our internet infrastructure will hold up. It is mind-blowing to see so much activity – from educational to professional, meetings to Yoga, how to cook, how to decorate, how to fill your time – that is, if you have time, and how about reconnecting with your college roommate, your grandparents who live on the other side of the country, your former clients/neighbors…. It just goes on and on. It’s amazing what happens when pushed to the wall – Facebook, Instagram, FaceTime, Zoom – even the at-risk seniors are having at it.

And then there’s WFH. Admittedly when I first saw WFH I thought WTF? Not to worry. It’s Work From Home of course, or working remotely to some of us. Do you have new respect for those who WFH? I do. It’s so hard. Of course there are the obvious: distractions, motivation, time management, skill, etc.  Oh, and you can go to work in your pjs. There’s that. But for far too many WFH is more stressful and more demanding. It is like being on call 24/7 or working under the expectation of producing more than is possible in a given amount of time. Kudos to those who are doing this. (and please – the new normal courtesy is to not bother these folks with texts, emails or pings as they really do have deadlines and are not just sitting at their computers hoping to have some fun)

Somewhere in between Essential and Non-essential, between Big Picture and Thumbnail is the issue of PARENTING.  Kids are resilient. What about their folks?

And what about the unthinkables – the homeless, the accident victims, the mentally ill, the prisoners, babies waiting to be born, patients needing chemo, morticians. What about those who are keeping watch over our faith, finances, safety, even our groceries, and, heaven help us, government? Unthinkable, yes?

Go figure. Maybe this got real on Friday the 13^th but guess what lies just ahead – yup, April Fool’s Day. So, let’s see if we can be better prepared for this one. 

• As we transition from the real to the virtual world, may we not grow roots into our chairs.
• May we find routines in each day and balance randomness with structure.
• May we continue to work with our calendars or datebooks or to-do lists and commit to them small but achievable daily goals.
• May we remember which day it is.
• May we journal. Who knows, it might become a best seller at a later epoch.
• May we embrace distraction. You know that me-time that we’re always told to find? Well, if we’re finding it and clinging to silence or solitude or stillness or something equally esoteric, and the phone rings or a text announces itself or the dog brings us a toy or a kid shouts out “Mom” as only a kid can shout, hey! Embrace that. Isn’t it nice to know that we are NOT alone and that someone wants us?
• May we be grateful for what we have and may that count for more than what we don’t have.
• May we be strong and healthy and kind.
• And may we not fall for any April Fool jokes this year.

*CDC.gov defines pandemic (not a word we’ve considered much) as: “… a global outbreak of disease. Pandemics happen when a new virus emerges to infect people and can spread between people sustainably. Because there is little to no pre-existing immunity against the new virus, it spreads worldwide.”  (emphasis supplied as to me this is what makes it so scary – how much mutation is there about which we are clueless and will remain uninformed?)