A “NEW” YEAR
Submitted by Linda Freeman for 12/29/201
“Active Vermont” [Rutland Herald and Times Argus]
At midnight on December 31st the year 2014 will begin. How do you feel about that? Do you remember this time fourteen years ago when we were about to enter the year 2000 amid predictions of massive universal computer failure, terrorist threats in the red zone and all kinds of foretold evidence of doom and destruction? Guess what. . .
And then there are the interminable, gag-me New Year’s Resolutions that are abandoned before memory can preserve them. All too often, rather than resolve to make worthwhile changes in our personal lives, what we really do is set ourselves up for failure, deepening the pit into which we may have fallen through bad habits or inappropriate lifestyle choices. Ugh.
What do you do to celebrate the New Year? I can remember my dad donning a tuxedo and my mother zipping up her favorite floor-length gown to go dancing on the eve of the 31st. Once they took all of us kids along. It was my father who taught me how to follow my partner’s lead and my mother who taught my brothers how to hold the door or seat her at the dining table. (Of course, being boys, they pretended to dump her on the floor, but they did get the message and subsequently polished off a few good manners when the occasion warranted.)
There was a formal sit-down dinner and a live orchestra that played until the famous countdown when everyone blew whistles, wore silly hats and left to drive home. (Sobriety? At that point I didn’t know enough to check.)
Later when my children and I moved to Vermont we celebrated big time but in pjs, watching old movies, abandoning dinner for a mound of glorious Vermont made snack foods and then dashing to the barn to wish our horses and ponies a happy new year of soundness and good horse show results.
Though friends of ours told of traveling to Woodstock to dine, dance and spend the evening at the Inn, it seemed that more of our friends were choosing to celebrate quietly at home reducing the risks associated with being on the road on a party night.
Some of us will look back on 2013, sorry to see it end. Others are already anticipating turning over a new leaf and moving into a new year.
As I write this, the word that pops out to me is “new.” Is January 1st really any different from December 31st? Do we feel older the day after our birthday? Probably not, but we did recognize the newness of the first day of school, didn’t we? Perhaps January 1st is similar. We turn to a new calendar page, begin a new session, and may even begin to think about the end of one tax year and the beginning of another.
By the time we get to New Year’s Day, we need a change. The preceding season has been hectic and our personal life is like a computer on overload. When the system is jammed we shut everything down and then restart. Could that be a better way to consider the transition into 2014 than a list of daunting resolutions?
When a client tells me he or she wants to become a new person, I discourage that concept and instead coax into definition parts of that person that are positive and worth developing. Over time we find that each has inner strength, inner qualities that make that person who he or she is. They don’t really want to chuck them all and begin again.
It’s classic that many folks want to “lose weight” and vow to begin on January 1st. To think that overnight one can turn from habits that have caused packing unhealthy and unnecessary body fat, is an exercise in sabotage. Can we begin the process? Of course. The more we learn and choose to eat and exercise healthfully, the better our chances of continuing a journey that may be long and sometimes slow, chiseling away extra stuff (body fat, stress, unattractive habits) that will chip away to reveal the real you or me underneath, the hidden athlete within, the optimism and enthusiasm that may have been buried for a long time, and the spontaneous laughter that can transform a discouraging day into one with possibilities.
In the long run, “new” is not what happens. Instead of “ring out the old” how about bring out the old, taking a second look at opportunities in the light of inevitable change.
If we are athletes, we may have already run our fastest race, but perhaps it is time to run our longest. If we cannot run, we can ride. If we cannot afford lift tickets, we can ski back country.
If overwhelmed raising small children or developing a professional career, perhaps now we can carve out daily time for deliberate physical activity. We might be able to step back for a few years, but at some point we need to prioritize our own well-being. It’s a no-brainer that if we want to be there for others, we need to be healthy, strong, and fit with enough energy to support and sustain.
Take this notion and go with it. Gather up all the frenzy and stress that drive your days and shut down your internal computer. Then push the restart button. When you open to a blank screen, what will you type in? Some things are up to us. Certainly circumstance, health, economy and relationships play starring roles, but where does one cross the line into excuse?
Connect with friends, explore the vast outdoor experience that the state of Vermont offers, commit to ourselves. There’s nothing new about any of this. It’s all here and now waiting to be utilized. Maybe giving ourselves permission to actively move into 2014 is what is new. The old is who we are already, undiscovered possibilities. Happy New Year.
