LATE SUMMER-EARLY AUTUMN

Late Summer-Early Autumn may be a season of it’s own. Lacking definitive start and end-dates, it’s a season that confuses itself. One day may mandate shorts and sleeveless tees and the next day it’s on with the fleece and maybe even gloves. As the daylight shortens, a sense of loss teases sadness, but just as quickly turns to anticipation of some of the best outdoors adventures of the year.

As past field editor of the Rutland Herald and Times Argus “Active Vermont” Sunday page, I often dedicated a Labor Day issue to the changes brought by return to school, K-post graduate. (Now THAT has traditionally triggered unique emotions as parents hand-hold little ones to their first day of school or reluctantly drive away from having deposited their big kids in their college dorms. Ouch. I for one hated those and often shed tears. Yeah, I know ….)

Needless to say, 2020 is different. Here in Vermont, not only is the season confused, so are we all and questions hang thickly around us as to what the school year will look like: in school or online or a hybrid? School sports are a go? What? How in the heck are kids supposed to qualify their mile run or fight for possession of a soccer ball all the time wearing a tightly fitted face mask? And why are they even having fall sports if we all agree that face masks are helpful? (well, most of us anyway) And oh lordy, please don’t anyone test positive. Dorms are occupied? But I digress.

As I reread some of my previous Active Vermont pieces, a common thread also connected with today. Whatever our age or association with the scholastic life, it’s quite possible that we continue to be influenced by an academic calendar. September means saying goodbye to a relaxed summer attitude and hello to the take-a-deep-breath and get-yourself-organized sass of a new school year a/k/a that which we must begin, complete, or otherwise dedicate our talents and energies.

In the good ole days, last year for example, athletes might be seriously training for, and anticipating, snow sports. Again, the mountains here are confused as to exactly how the snow will be utilized this season. Perhaps it is safe to say that since last March, every recreational or competitive sport or activity has been reimagined. And as I write this and you read it, it’s quite likely that some serious adaptation will continue past this confused and confusing season all the way to what – the end of the year?

But it’s not all bad. Just as those of us who have been blessedly unscathed by illness during the time of Covid have found unexpected pleasure in newfound gentler ways of living; and just as those of us who have been unfortunately impacted by the financial blows of Covid but are still afloat have found unexpected pleasure in simplicity, so, too, it is perfectly possible that we are finding new forms of connection, exercise, and pathways to fitness and well-being.  (Phew, that was a long sentence but you do understand, don’t you?)

So, perhaps, at this time of year that doesn’t quite know if it’s still summer or if hints of cold are real or imagined, perhaps we, as passengers on this rerouted train might find novel ways to reimagine the sights and reconfigure our response to what is happening all around us. (Note, more than the Coronavirus can be novel!) As we turn the corner into mid-late autumn, stick season lies ahead. Until then we can carry on with a restructured lifestyle, reaching out safely to those in our network and embracing our personal and professional communities as we become more and more adept at distancing, masking, Zooming and loving. Living creatively has never been more in vogue.

ZOOM FATIGUE

Yoga at home with Zoom

Zoom Fatigue is more than a hip and savvy buzz-phrase. It is relevant, here and now, blurring the lines of work and home while robbing possibilities and extinguishing the potential to thrive.

As the early days of March are crawling forward through the remaining weeks and months of 2020, reliance on technology continues to provide that which is desperately needed as, at the same time, it overwhelms and causes very real problems.

As early as April, 2020, Zoom Fatigue received media attention.  Forbes.com, for example, pointed to communication disconnect, technical challenges, and maintaining a work/life balance as energy draining. Physically what does all that screen time do to our shoulders, necks and upper bodies as well as our eyes and those poor hands and wrists typing away in response. We stare at the screen and need to work harder to find the nuances of personality and body language reactions. Even what has been the fun of showing up in our pajamas, has a down side. Dressing for an event puts us in the mood and helps sharpen us mentally as well as energetically.

This is a broad topic indeed. Let’s narrow it to the Yoga business. Yoga teachers and business owners are creative! By the end of March, my colleagues and I were all doing battle with streaming live classes, recording those classes to be shared later, seeking ways to build an accessible video library and, perhaps most daunting, reaching out to students encouraging them to open their hearts and minds and shift their practice to an online format.

We as teachers had to quickly relearn how to plan and teach, how to adapt space, camera, audio and light to recording. We needed to seek help from others and simplify our practices, slow down, and offer safe asanas and flows that could be easily followed. We became addicted to podcasts of those who had gone before us. Studio owners needed to compute the costs of maintaining a studio in hopes of future use, recalculate when partial use was offered, and care for their instructors as well as clients. (Note: some business owners furloughed their instructors without pay while others nurtured online teaching.) As I write this, many large and successful big city Yoga studios and franchises – with big city expenses – have gone out of business. Small studios fell early on, except for a few who are hanging on due to the dedication and generosity of their owners. The tipping point is precarious. Often what saves is the sheer commitment of the clientele who realize that their continued support is more than a kind gesture; it is an act of continuing self-respect and self-care.

There is no question that this business is forever changed. Numbers tell the story. First there was the initial reluctance assuming that things would return to normal in a few days or weeks. Then there was surprised enthusiasm for streamed classes in which participants could actually visit with each other prior to and after the class. Noting the value of this, many who started on Facebook made the move to Zoom. For awhile, it took off. And then the numbers began to decline. Students no longer prioritized their class times and somehow just didn’t get around to opening the link to the recorded session. The HABIT, and yes, jumping on a Zoom call for a Yoga class became a new habit, was weakened if not broken and Zoom Fatigue became a reality.

ZOOM FATIGUE

What about the student? I can speak here from experience as I am both a student and a teacher. As much as I love my Yoga practice, it is often very challenging for me to roll out my mat and fully engage with the online class I am about to take. Once begun, it is equally challenging to remain with the practice and not wander to the kitchen to refill my coffee mug or stop to check my text messages. As my community gradually reopens I find more and more conflicts with the live classes that I have joined daily, and then am challenged even further to put aside the space in my day to utilize the video recording. There are times when I simply must force myself back into the momentum and, of course, after, I am transformed.

As a student and a teacher I can say, if we want our Yoga connections, if we want to maintain our Yoga habit in community, if we want our studio to be there for us in the future, if we want to truly realize the value of this amazing practice, we must step up. Stepping up might mean buying another class package or stepping up might mean creating a Yoga space in our home where we will step onto our mat daily to balance, strengthen and regenerate ourselves with or without guidance and support. Stepping up might mean exactly what we do in Savasana – receive, be open to other options, look forward with curiosity and anticipation not back with regret.s

Thich Nhat Hanh said:  “If you want a garden, you have to bend down and touch the soil. Gardening is a practice, not an idea.”  Well, there you have it.

Fatigue can take you down so far it redefines itself into something dark and dangerous. Each individual experiences fatigue in a uniquely personal way. Some do the proverbial “pull yourself up by your bootstrap” thing and, by putting one foot in front of the other, get back on track. Some find it best to honor fatigue – give it space and time to heal and regenerate. Whether we simply keep on or take a break assumes that first we have acknowledged that fatigue is threatening. Quit or renew? Ahhhhhh.

Yes, Zoom Fatigue is real. It is a very today thing. Though Zoom may not be your platform, it is clear that the foundation of your daily life as you knew it on New Year’s Eve is substantially altered. Where next? Seek courage?

“Know that you are not alone  And that this darkness has purpose;  Gradually it will school your eyes  To find the one gift your life requires  Hidden within this night-corner.  …

A new confidence will come alive  To urge you toward higher ground  Where your imagination  Will learn to engage difficulty  As its most rewarding threshold.”*

 *FOR COURAGE. Excerpted from To Bless the Space Between Us, A Book of Blessings, John O’Donohue, Convergent Books, 2008.

RETURNING? I DON’T THINK SO. Reimagining a new way to teach and train in studio, gym, outdoors or virtually.

 

It’s not just the large gym or small studio in urban or rural U.S. Globally the fitness industry is metaphorically scratching its head wondering how to handle each day. Though there is no one who is able to predict the future, it is becoming increasingly clear that a “return” to life as it was before the pandemic (and it’s not over yet, oh dear) is not a reality. Can we patch things up and do a mockup of something similar? Can we limit numbers, insure spacing, sanitize endlessly, mask uncomfortably, and provide safety assurances? Is that even productive or wise?

finding ways to distance and pause

This post is not yet another diatribe about the state of today’s world financially, socially, politically, or medically. It is a small voice from the small perspective of a small town in Vermont. I am a Personal Trainer and Yoga Instructor and, primarily because I have participated in many activities and am constantly studying anything available relative to my work, my depth of information and practice is appreciable. Over the years, working one on one, in small groups or large classes, as a director of a gym and as an athletic coach for individual sports, I have watched participants, sometimes reluctantly-sometimes enthusiastically, strain, drive, compete and press towards goals on individual paths. I, too, became obsessed with heart rates, watts, mileage, speed, power and an infinite variety of numbers to measure everything from fuel to output to recovery time all designed to indicate success or failure.

Savasana

Fortunately for my own personal well-being and hopefully for that of my students and clients, I have become passionate about the practice of Yoga – whether it is Yoga for Athletes (my introduction to Yoga with Sage Rountree), Vinyasa (thank you Freeport Yoga Company and Kripalu) or the complementary practice of Yin Yoga (Josh Summers and Terry Cockburn, Summers School of Yin Yoga). I can speak only from my very small dot on the map of “return.”

Who knew? Those of us who have spent 200, 300, 500, 1,000 hours in Yoga Teacher Trainings, specialty courses, even in cadaver labs as we have learned about the thousands of years old Yoga theory and practice, anatomy, even how to teach; who knew that we would need to add a crash course in technology and become adept at something called live-streaming, recording or Zoom? Who knew we would suddenly need to learn to teach a different way – and, for that matter, to learn a different way as we joined other students in other teachers’ virtual classes? Who knew we would be faced with legal technicalities, internet crashes and how to create space in which to teach, adapt or purchase camera and sound equipment and on and on and on. 

Perhaps the trickiest hurdle has been connecting with our students and providing them with practice and support that is worthy of their fee. In the beginning many teachers offered online services as a gift. The next step was an honor system. Then links and passwords needed to be purchased and voila a new industry was born. Recently I listened to a mind-boggling podcast about a new wave of abuse – no, not the inappropriate touching scandal that has suddenly vanished – but the abuse of instructors who are paid a set sum to teach their class and then forever after their videos are sold with profit only to the business owner. Ouch. (And, as I have used the word “small” frequently in this post, please note that in the small studio where I work this is a completely foreign concept. We are all in this together supporting each other and our lovely leader, Ana. http://www.mountainrosevt.com) Just sayin’

quiet trails for exercise and contemplation

But there are beautiful and significant observations to be made as well. As soon as it was deemed safe to go outdoors, masked and spaced, individuals and families, thrilled to be able to do so, were out the door walking, running, hiking, strolling, climbing, cycling and paddling. Gone was the drive that forced such an adventure. Exercise, action, the outdoors, all became a privilege and, in this new light, became gifted joy.

Community has been redefined. Even the tiniest connection – a phone call or text, photo or face time, card or package – is duly appreciated forging bonds replacing tenuous strands. And in my own small (there’s that word again) world of Zoom, those minutes of unmuted video before and after a teacher-led practice are golden; they are fun and sensitive and compelling moments of genuine community.

Inserting stillness, a by-product of Yoga, everywhere and anywhere.

Virtual hugs are bogus, are they not? Those foolish little emoji of the smiling face with 2 arms? Give me a break. I’m not so sure about the etiquette of a handshake, but we will hug again. We cannot resist! But perhaps we will retain some of the goodness of this experience. Perhaps we will live a cleaner and simpler life. Perhaps we will offer and receive touch untainted by skepticism or misunderstanding. Perhaps we will gratefully relish the effort to proactively care for our own well-being in order to reach out to others in our lives. Perhaps we will loosen the fetters of restrained emotions and be honest, sharing and, yes, grateful. Perhaps we will find cause for happiness in things as presumably insignificant as a buzzing bee all the way up to financial stability or a clean bill of health.

Perhaps we will like taking a Yoga class in a new setting, bringing our own props, and washing our hands.

create a personal home Yoga space

Perhaps we will even like participating in a Yoga practice in a virtual community, as we say, “live or later.” Perhaps we are ready for what is new and not a mended version of what was before. Perhaps.

POST LOCKDOWN

POST LOCKDOWN. Thoughts on what lies ahead from a small-town Yoga instructor. May 8, 2020.

As I write this, the strands of the tightly laced corset of a National response to the pandemic Coronavirus of 2020 are being loosened. Unprecedented. Social distancing. Refrigerated trucks. Protest. Connection. Zoom. Essential. Quarantine. Hoarding. Generosity. Curbside. Antibodies. And my personal favorite: “Anthony Fauci has been nominated as sexiest man of the year.” Not only is the Coronavirus “novel,” daily life is about as novel as it gets.

Those of us who live in Vermont have experienced a microcosm of what the world has known. Most of us are proud of our State and proud of our Governor and staff who have led us relatively safely through dangerous territory. To be science-based and bipartisan is to be honored. And we’re not home free yet. Nor will we be in the foreseeable future. “New normal.” How unpleasant has that flippant remark become? Economically, will some of us still be here when the dust settles?

Oh, how heart wrenching are the photographs of loved ones touching through a plate glass window or disturbing footage of patients on ventilators or bodies awaiting disposal or hungry children in this, our country. No, folks, sorry but social distancing, wearing a mask and gloves, respecting our neighbors, is a much smaller price to pay to this enormous unknown.

Slow down – the best way to merge.

Many years ago, I passed another road sign that stayed with me:  Merge Gently. May we, in our neighborhoods, in our workplaces, in our social settings, merge gently back to a safe tomorrow. May we, for heaven’s sake, put aside bickering and pontificating as if we know it all. Patience.

Yes, fine for me to say. I hear you.

As a Personal Trainer and Yoga Instructor, my singular experience has been far removed from the tragedy and horror. Immediately I scrambled to maintain an income on one hand and to reinforce my connections with family, friends and students from near and far. Ahhhhh. Bless technology (which I have frequently cursed – just not my forte) and social media (a kidnapping I had tried to avoid!) To make a long story short, teaching live stream Yoga classes has become a means of connection and perpetuity. I am a teacher. I must teach. To have this opportunity to continue to do so – even if I find myself talking into the camera of a MacBook Air – is an unintended blessing and perhaps an unintended consequence of where so many of us might be headed as the, can I even say it?, “new normal” defines itself?

In my own daily life I am happy to be able to “see” my teachers and Yoga students as we practice together. We can exchange verbal or “commented” greetings and experience, with exquisite sensitivity, a connection that perhaps transcends the physical. Thus enriched, perhaps as we do, once again, practice in spatial proximity or meet for coffee or a hike, we will do so with authenticity and leave behind some of the trivialities that plague human bonds.

But instead of offering my own thoughts, let me share a few written with wisdom beyond my imaginings.

“Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it, no less than in the excitement and gladness…because in the last analysis all moments are key moments and life itself is grace.” (Frederick Buechner)

Comparing our tentative steps during these days and weeks might well parallel a dawn.

“Nighttime is womb-time. Our souls come out to play…We rest in the night. The dawn is a refreshing time, a time of possibility and promise…Just as darkness brings rest and release, so the dawn brings awakening and renewal. (John O’Donohue, Anam Cara)

And, finally, from Marianne Williamson: “It is contrary to the universal order for darkness to remain. All storms pass. The prince always arrives to kiss and awaken Sleeping Beauty.”

Oh that we might emerge from this darkness with “awakening and renewal.” (And what about that Prince, you ask?)

A good time to come to the mat.

[ If you would like to join me for a Yoga class, live-stream or video reproduction, visit the Mountain Rose Integrated Health and Wellness Center Facebook page where my practices appear on Tuesday and Thursday 5-6:15 p.m. (Yin Yoga) and Friday mornings at 8-9 a.m. (Core & Go, asanas with an emphasis on the core and subsequently getting outdoors!). Contact Ana on FB for payment. Hope to see you on your mat!]

The Coronavirus – Friday the 13th Or The New Normal, March 2020

Vermont

March 2020 will be remembered. And not nicely. Perhaps it was on Friday the 13th that you and I, living comfortably in the United States (note, I speak and write from Vermont which is not representative of the US as a whole) first accepted the reality of the Coronavirus pandemic.*

me time

Unfortunately, Friday the 13th has been dusted off and redefined. Some of you, of course, had been prescient, or at least paying attention, and had been stocking up on food and emergency supplies. Others were reluctant – even a few who continue to doubt and insist on throwing the flu into the mix. Be that as it may, as I write this, we are beginning week 3 of The New Normal and I am compelled to keep my blog posts alive. So here goes.

To all those who are deemed ESSENTIAL, thank you. The Big Picture is not pretty. I don’t know about you, but I find it heart-wrenching to consider those unable to be with a loved one who is terminally ill; or to be that loved one dying alone; or to worry about keeping one’s family safe and fed, and wonder just how far one can hold out on limited resources. Dire indeed. For generations to come acts of generosity and selflessness will be passed from parent to child. We watch press conferences and see our State and Local leaders working on our behalf and looking exhausted. And we realize that community is not a geographical designation.

To those of us who are NON-ESSENTIAL, well, I guess it’s nice to know! The Big Picture is one thing but the Thumbnail is also compelling.  I can walk out my door and into the woods without seeing another person. How on earth do people manage exile within their own homes or to be living in an apartment dwelling with multiple floors separating their room(s) from ground level.

hiding won’t help

Screen time is UP. My guess is that after the initial binge-watching of Netflix, much of screen time is spent on news and connection. It is, after all, a time to reach out to an ever-expanding virtual community and know that we are not alone. One can only hope that our internet infrastructure will hold up. It is mind-blowing to see so much activity – from educational to professional, meetings to Yoga, how to cook, how to decorate, how to fill your time – that is, if you have time, and how about reconnecting with your college roommate, your grandparents who live on the other side of the country, your former clients/neighbors…. It just goes on and on. It’s amazing what happens when pushed to the wall – Facebook, Instagram, FaceTime, Zoom – even the at-risk seniors are having at it.

And then there’s WFH. Admittedly when I first saw WFH I thought WTF? Not to worry. It’s Work From Home of course, or working remotely to some of us. Do you have new respect for those who WFH? I do. It’s so hard. Of course there are the obvious: distractions, motivation, time management, skill, etc.  Oh, and you can go to work in your pjs. There’s that. But for far too many WFH is more stressful and more demanding. It is like being on call 24/7 or working under the expectation of producing more than is possible in a given amount of time. Kudos to those who are doing this. (and please – the new normal courtesy is to not bother these folks with texts, emails or pings as they really do have deadlines and are not just sitting at their computers hoping to have some fun)

Somewhere in between Essential and Non-essential, between Big Picture and Thumbnail is the issue of PARENTING.  Kids are resilient. What about their folks?

And what about the unthinkables – the homeless, the accident victims, the mentally ill, the prisoners, babies waiting to be born, patients needing chemo, morticians. What about those who are keeping watch over our faith, finances, safety, even our groceries, and, heaven help us, government? Unthinkable, yes?

Get outside – anywhere and whenever you can – distancing of course.

Go figure. Maybe this got real on Friday the 13th but guess what lies just ahead – yup, April Fool’s Day. So, let’s see if we can be better prepared for this one. 

  • As we transition from the real to the virtual world, may we not grow roots into our chairs.
  • May we find routines in each day and balance randomness with structure.
  • May we continue to work with our calendars or datebooks or to-do lists and commit to them small but achievable daily goals.
  • May we remember which day it is.
  • May we journal. Who knows, it might become a best seller at a later epoch.
  • May we embrace distraction. You know that me-time that we’re always told to find? Well, if we’re finding it and clinging to silence or solitude or stillness or something equally esoteric, and the phone rings or a text announces itself or the dog brings us a toy or a kid shouts out “Mom” as only a kid can shout, hey! Embrace that. Isn’t it nice to know that we are NOT alone and that someone wants us?
  • May we be grateful for what we have and may that count for more than what we don’t have.
  • May we be strong and healthy and kind.
  • And may we not fall for any April Fool jokes this year.

*CDC.gov defines pandemic (not a word we’ve considered much) as: “… a global outbreak of disease. Pandemics happen when a new virus emerges to infect people and can spread between people sustainably. Because there is little to no pre-existing immunity against the new virus, it spreads worldwide.”  (emphasis supplied as to me this is what makes it so scary – how much mutation is there about which we are clueless and will remain uninformed?)

SUPER SNOW MOON 2020

 

 

A Vermont Full Moon                                                                                Stephen Hard

“Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon and the truth.”  The Buddha

With luck, and a break in the weather, on February 9th this year we should be witness to a rather spectacular, and aptly named, full moon – The Super Snow Moon. Just days before we are being pummeled with the wonderful white stuff after which this moon is named. Albert Einstein said: “I like to think that the moon is there even if I am not looking at it.” Believe me, if it is visible, we’ll all be looking at this one!

A full moon hints of magic and begs celebration.  A mixed bag of behaviors accompany full moon lore – sometimes outlandish sometimes silly sometimes dark and dangerous. But are there forces of the moon that cause these behaviors or is it coincidence illuminated by the light of the moon and the unusual attention irresistibly drawn to the night sky. Perhaps the strangeness of the woods or the increase in midnight activity that so many of us report of humans or animals both domestic and wild (lunacy? looney-tunes?) can be rationalized by the fact that we are up and about during moonlit hours. However, if you are reading this, I’m pretty certain you have your own stories to tell of actions or events teased by the moon.

Here in the mountains of the NorthEast, celebration seems to succumb to the magnetic pull of nature. Over a decade ago I was invited to join good friends for a full moon snowshoe. That hike, as well as the brilliantly lit drive back home on a normally dark country road, was so remarkable that to this day I continue to find some way to celebrate as many full moons as possible. Today I plan a hike with my dog and 2 family members to a summit that will give me a 360 view from the lake to the mountains. The moon rises early so I’ll probably hike up in the alpenglow of the sunset and bathe in the light of the moon at the top. At other times I have paddled off the coast of Maine, picnicked in the dark, led a full moon Yin Yoga class or walked along the river. Always I marvel at the speed with which the moon rises. Always I value the opportunity to experience the moon – alone with my pup or with friends or family – with those in my life.

“You cannot look up at the night sky on the Planet Earth and not wonder what it’s like to be up there amongst the stars. And I always look up at the moon and see it as the single most romantic place within the cosmos.” Tom Hanks.

Not surprisingly, contemplation of this natural wonder leads to profound thinking. Significant individually and collectively is the moon’s relentless pattern of cycles. Notable is the Moon’s cool balance of the Sun’s heat, the Yin to the Yang. Though it is easy to consider the full moon to represent culmination, it is equally appropriate to see it as the peak of the lunar cycle – a time for magic – and yet more, to accept the fullness as a beginning, especially with respect to the setting of intention. The moon represents the divine feminine. The hours surrounding its fullness are hours of perspective and introspection, calming and cleansing to the spirit.

This lunar marvel may say it all; it may challenge us to acknowledge possibilities, relinquish completion, recognize abundance and let go of that which we inappropriate cling to and yet no longer need.

Finally, pausing to give the full moon a moment of ourselves is also pausing in connection. After all, aren’t we all? Connected, that is. All living beings, the earth, the universe? May I share a sweet habit with you? I began this as a child with my mother and I continue it regularly with my brother and any of my family members who happen to remember this sappy thing that mom does. Sigh. I look at the full moon and shout out “Hey brother!” And sometime before dawn an email will arrive with a “Hey sis – did you hear me?” Of course.

Full Moon Hike, Bolton, Tara Dugan

May you indulge in the Super Snow Moon of 2020 and may you give a shout out to someone you love.

“I still say, ‘Shoot for the moon; you might get there.” Buzz Aldrin.

JANUARY THAW 2020

The concept of THAW is pretty simple: what is hard or frozen softens or liquifies in the presence of warmth. When THAW = MELT one can explore myriad possibilities and implications – physically, mentally and emotionally.

When the thermometer rises, the winds blow and the rain pounds down in Northern New England, plans change abruptly to include flood warnings, power outages and just plain disappointment. As I write this, it is January 11 and there is, of course, the notion that this is simply our “January thaw” for this year. On the other hand, with all the horrific weather events that we’re (almost) getting used to, and the fact that this is, what, our 6th thaw this winter (?), is this alarming? At best, though it gives us pause. In spite of the ever-present threat of the possibility of damage or danger caused by irresistible forces of nature, there is relief from biting cold and an almost playful tease in the air. (60 degrees? Really?!)

Yes, our snow sports, and by extension, our winter recreational industries, take a hit. Alpine trails are at the mercy of lifts shut down on wind-hold, deadly dangerous ice and nearly as dangerous slush. Kids and young athletes wring their un-gloved hands in distress when they hear that their early races have been cancelled. Nordic ski areas suffer the melting of meticulously groomed tracks, ponds transition to off-limit, VAST trails reduce to dirt, and even wooded walks require a strange mixture of waterproof boots and microspikes to slog through varied conditions.

Perhaps there’s a good side to all this. For one thing, we do so appreciate the vividly clear winter day when there is nothing more beautiful than sunshine on clean white snow. The flip side is always bleak, muddy and messy.  But isn’t life like this?

Today, while Sophie, my Chocolate Lab, and I took an unusually long time to travel an unusually short distance trudging our usual trails, I had plenty of time to laugh at her as she found opportunity to make a game out of just about everything. I also pondered the word THAW. Playing with shades of significance is an organic game. Toss a pebble (word) into a pond (mind) and watch the ripples (ideas) flow and expand.

To look on the dark side, thawing represents loss. To look on the bright side, thawing suggests softening, warming, even reshaping. Perhaps a thaw is a reminder of impermanence.

And then there’s the notion of melting. Yoga practitioners are familiar with Anahatasana, that wonderfully delicious heart-melting pose. After several minutes settling into this posture, the pose informs the body and the body informs the heart – it is good, it is safe, it is worthy to open, to be receptive, to love and be loved.

From the wisdom learned and shared by those who have come before us throughout generations, centuries, millennia, and previous to that, we embrace the balance of power and peace, strength and flexibility, masculine and feminine, Yang and Yin. We learn that softening the rough edges of aggression and force does not necessarily dilute strength. We hear the suggestion that melting the heart to practice tolerance and empathy does not, in turn, open us to vulnerability. We hope to melt debilitating tension to a form of useful energy. We recognize action as positive and, likewise, that passive does not mean weak, lazy or ineffective, but rather, thoughtful, generous and enduring.

A Yoga class is often ended with “OM” or a metta – a heart opening practice of loving kindness expressed to self and to others. In closing, I open my heart to you: “May you feel protected and safe. May you feel contented and pleased. May your body support you with strength. May your life unfold smoothly and with ease.” Happy January Thaw!

FIRST TRACKS. JANUARY 1, 2020


First tracks. Looking ahead at unspoiled terrain inviting your footprints; looking back to see where you’ve come from. Ah, the symbolism is rich, is it not?

Be bold, step out into a place where you’ve not been; be confident, knowing that if you make a wrong turn you can always retrace your steps and begin again.

Don’t forget signs that guide along the way!

Alone or in community the significance is sweet. January 1st is as well. It’s not only the first day of a new year, it’s the first day of a new decade. What will we do with it?

What did we do with the previous one? (begs a recap, doesn’t it?) My own 10 years were packed with personal, professional and athletic challenges and successes, bursting at the seams with change, yet always marching forward on the same path with the same private yearning to be a better and more worthy human being. I need to work at bravery and have found myself well beyond my comfort zone far too often, But, you know what? My comfort zone has grown! And so have my practices, goals, and preferences. Expansive living may be a product of age. Is time flying by too quickly? Yes! I have so much I want to accomplish – but don’t we all? (And, BTW, if I let concerns about aging creep in, I need only remind myself that there are people running for PRESIDENT who are older than me. I’ve got this!)

New Year’s Resolutions may be passé, but setting achievable goals is always in vogue. When I work with a client, I might ask – and why are we doing this? What is your target area? Can you feel your muscles, bones, whatever, respond? Do you understand why this or that is important?

When I teach a Yoga class I might ask what is your intention for this asana, this practice, this day? When I invite someone new into my BCBS hiking group, The Hiking Connection, I ask them to realistically define their hiking goals over the course of multiple months.

As athletes, fitness enthusiasts, parents, and friends it is worthwhile to identify wants, needs, risks and rewards, to set meaningful goals and then do the work to achieve those goals.

There is always a first step, perhaps those first tracks. How relevant is it to lace up your running shoes, walk into a gym, dive into a pool, pump up your bike tires, click into your bindings or step onto your yoga mat.  The rest will not follow until you make that first move, and what may follow just might be the revelation of first tracks into what is unknown.

While this is all poetic and lovely to ponder, it is also a call to action. Nothing, absolutely nothing, will happen unless you do it. (I will forever appreciate the Nike “Just Do It” slogan!) It is not a matter of perfection, beauty or winning. It is a matter of knowing what tools are in your tool box, which ones need sharpening and what others you might need to work to acquire. Making the most of your physical strengths and weakness is only a piece of the pie. Consider motivation, enthusiasm, a positive outlook, the hunger to learn, a willingness to share, the determination to see it through and the wisdom to make good choices.

There were many moments during this past holiday that I thought – It just doesn’t get any better than this. I awkwardly dragged in my Christmas tree, managed to set it up and trim it without incident, then turned off all the lights to sit and soak up the silent beauty.  It just doesn’t get any better than this. I snuggled my 4 grandchildren in a pile of quilts, blankets and pillows for our vacation sleepover making plans for snow play the following morning and giggling over the onslaught of Sophie’s kisses. It just doesn’t get any better than this. I wrapped presents, tying them up with love and thought It just doesn’t get any better than this. I made it a point to pause early each morning with my first cup of coffee and my Sophie in my lap (sort of, she’s awfully big for that but tries) looking out as the day began to dawn and thought It just doesn’t get any better than this. As a teacher sitting quietly observing diverse students in my classes during Savasana, connection palpable, I thought It just doesn’t get any better than this. And today, headed out into the woods with my precious pup, softly crunching new snow under my boots and laughing at her antics as she ran and rolled in the fabulous white stuff, I was convinced that It just doesn’t get any better than this.

May you have many, many such moments in 2020 and may you reach many, if not all, of your goals and carefully structured expectations. Namaste. Happy First Tracks!

SEASONS’ GREETINGS. What does that actually mean?

Seasons’ Greetings. What does that actually mean? How does the season in which you navigate through your days affect your body, mind and spirit? And what in the world is going on? I shared the following on FB recently but can’t get it out of my head – actually not a bad thing – so am sharing it again:

“Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally. The broken world waits in darkness for the light that is you.” (Gratefullness.org)

This particular December is packed with overlapping seasonal dates. As I write this, Winter Solstice has happened and now, thankfully, the short days are magically lengthening, even if by small increments. On the 21st I joined family and friends around a blazing bonfire with starry sky overhead and darkly lit woods behind. What a way to greet the solstice!

At one time I was warmly welcomed into a community that celebrated Hanukkah with devotion and enthusiasm. December 22nd, Hanukkah begins, a tradition I continue to respect and honor. December 24 is Christmas Eve, a day that means different things to different people.

I treasure this tiny Nativity (not 2″ high) carried home in a backpack by my daughter whose first semester abroad was spent in France, returning home just in time to celebrate Christmas.

As a child, Christmas Eve meant staying awake for a midnight church service and returning home to the tree where I was allowed to open one present before going to bed. As a parent the Eve of Christmas morning meant waiting until the kids were asleep and then staying up most of the night putting things together or stealthily suggesting that Santa had arrived with more stuff than could possibly fit down the chimney. And, of course, as a Christian, paying homage to the origins of the holy day.

Now, with adult children, Christmas Day is rich with significance. Refusing to let one sad thought enter my mind, I dredge up delightful memories and plunge headlong into sleepovers with my grandkids and fun-filled activities with my big kids. (always allowing them to do the cooking – I continue to hate to cook!)

Then on the 26th there’s Kwanzaa. Frankly, I know little about this holiday but feel deeply about multiculturalism, diversity and the unification of the many who live in our country.

But I DO know something about December 31st, a day to pull out all sorts of “re” words – resolve, renew, reflect, reorganize, reevaluate, regenerate, reset – please add on as many as you can!

There are two “re” words that have recently been highlighted for me and I share them here.

RECEIVE. As human beings, whether parent, care-giver, teacher, snow remover, sales person, medical care provider, trash hauler, pet sitter, you name it, we give, and we do so according to our personal commitment. Rarely do we allow ourselves to receive. A few weeks ago at a training at Kripalu, in each of the Vinyasa classes I joined, at the final pose, Savasana, we were invited to find stillness and to RECEIVE. Once planted, I have been watching that seed grow and invite you to do the same.

RELATIONSHIP. One of my favorite writers, Eugene Peterson, passed not that long ago. Speaking of his father, one of his son’s suggested that Peterson preached only one message – about RELATIONSHIP. So, I plant yet another seed and watch it grow. I observe relationship continuously. I try to practice relationship from my heart. RELATIONSHIP is a very large word.

So today, perhaps SEASONS’ GREETINGS is, in fact, the appropriate sentiment. I greet you in relationship and wish for you to receive peace, goodness, love.

May 2020 be a year of insight (with 2020 vision?) and action. May it be a year in which we, and those with whom we share this planet, enjoy enough and participate in the care and unity of all.

SEASONS’ GREETINGS, indeed

NOVEMBER NOTES FROM VERMONT 2019

 

A PERSONAL NOTE. On October 28, 2018 I moved into my new home, returning to the place I love the most – the Mad River Valley, Vermont. On October 30, 2019 I closed on my former house after an arduous and anxious year of being the “seller.” These 2 dates seem to be so clean and neat and uncomplicated, but they represent years of seeking, finding and adapting; years of identifying problems and defining solutions; years of change bolstered by the need to be bold yet sustained by faith, family and friends.

Now, before I go a sentence farther, rest assured – I am completely healthy, strong and always grateful for an inordinate supply of energy and positivity. No, there was nothing really wrong with my life, but it was simply time to change things up, to take the next step, and to live a life more in concert with my personal goals, ethics and inner voice. (and no I am not talking to myself – though I do talk to my dog a lot!)

All of this being said, perhaps the thoughts that are front and center to me from my waking minutes on throughout my day are thoughts of gratitude. As I return to these thoughts time and time again I find I am continuously renewed and supplied with the curiosity and creativity I need to do my work and live my life.

Irresistible advice shamelessly lifted from the FB page of Janet Richardson.

So, that’s me. What about you? Do you relate to any of this? Does each day’s sunrise herald a new day to explore or the start of yet more drudgery? If the latter, are there any changes you can make to find joy? Do you pause to notice the trees’ shadows on the snow as the moonlight shines through? (Yeah, I know, snow, right? But that’s exactly the pause I needed to observe last night and it’s only 11/9.) Yes, of course, life can be unerringly difficult, but even finding a few pockets helps….

STUDENT LIFE. I love being a student. I love research and prefer it always to creation. I could never, for example, write fiction, but I could do a decent job collecting and sharing researched material. I’m not clever enough to reinvent the wheel, but will happily use what is already in place, the excellence of someone smarter and wiser who has gone before me. It is natural, therefore, that my work is in the field of fitness, and in recent years Yoga, where student opportunities are infinite and experience plays a significant role.

And now, in November, I find myself associated with a beautiful studio near my home, Mountain Rose Integrated Wellness Center, (http://www.mountainrosevt.com) founded and led by Ana del Rosal, a deeply qualified and gifted professional who has created a sacred space in which to share the practice of Yoga and oh so much more. Furthermore, though I had roots in this Valley, I am excited to reconnect with friends, make so very many new friends through my teaching, and sharing my work with former clients in new surroundings.

When I first visited this area way back when my babies were babies, I distinctly remember driving to the grocery store and thinking – “wow, in this place, even a mundane task is gorgeous!” – and I promised myself that I would never take it for granted. This week, in one of my classes, I shared this quote and it reminded me of my previous vow. “Life is mostly about mundane experiences. When you start thinking that only your most thrilling experiences are significant, you have already lost the most precious thing in life, the ability to fully immerse yourself in every experience.” (tricycle.org)

Please, I implore you, find the student within. Now that we are all grown up (ha!), we have probably left behind our childhood aversion to school. Whatever our personal lives may look like, whatever physical, emotional, financial and professional limitations are imposed from without or self-imposed, we can always jump on that wagon of curiosity and take a little ride. (And don’t you just love that word – curiosity?!)

ARE YOU SAFE? My final November note comes from an unlikely source. Recently I had a flat tire. As a cyclist, “flatting” took on a dreaded significance as I truly hated changing a tire on the side of the road. Did I say I hated it? Indeed! But when it comes to my car, it’s AAA all the way. I made the call and the very first thing the answering voice said was “Are you safe?” I was. I was at home and my car was in the parking lot outside my door, thanks to a very slow leak. I was serviced immediately and everything turned out just great. But those 3 words set me off down many mental paths. Should this be a question we ask ourselves far more frequently during each day? Should these three words govern decisions or initiate warning bells in our heads?

You know what? I’ve sounded a bit too preachy in this post so I’m going to leave it at that and let you take it from here. If you have shared a Yoga class with me you know that I often refer to our Yoga mats as a place of safety, our own personal space where we can move and experience our practice in an entirely and uniquely individual way. (Note, even here we must always question those 3 words. That’s a topic for another day. It is also the blessing of an impeccable studio and staff.)

NOVEMBER, by Terry Cockburn (https://freeportyogaco.com). This week I taught a 90 minute Yin Yoga practice and borrowed the following words from my teacher, Terry Cockburn. The only hitch was that our outside world was being quickly covered by snow so the timing seemed a touch off. But you’ll get the pointJ Enjoy, be safe, be curious and be bold.

“November is a time of transition.  Here in New England, we witness the rapidly changing landscape as the trees shed their leaves, and the chill of wind moves through, drying the earth, the air and our bodies.  As we move toward shorter, darker days, the expansive, yang energy of summer is consumed by the contractive, introspective yin energy of the autumn.   Observing and honoring the downward, inward energy of this time of year and learning to live in harmony with the spirit of the season can contribute to our overall health and wellbeing.  Taking a cue from nature, as it slows down and rests for a bit, we too, may benefit from sleeping a little longer, eating warm, nourishing foods and paying closer attention to our inner world.”

a snapshot of inevitability – lfreeman