Category Archives: Mindfulness

Past Peak and Still Beautiful, Natural Seasons and Life Cycles Suggest Each Other

Watching as the world around us transition from season to season circling the year’s clock face, pass through clearly defined phases and then reconnect to begin again is a lesson in change, adaptation, and light. Yes, light. If we look – really look – with our physical eyes, inner sight, mental clarity and creative vision, we learn lessons that support and sustain us as we move forward.

Watching necessitates a pause. Framing a vast scene or a tiny fragment for a photo or mental image is an act of simplification, magnification, wonder and respect.

Last weekend here in Vermont we were flooded with gorgeous, brilliant colors topped with a dusting of snow on our highest peaks. This weekend we are Past Peak and Still Beautiful. As I noted this on my walk, I was startled to realize that this is a meaningful concept indeed! How often do we admire an antique, painting, vintage clothing or older friend? How much do we appreciate the athlete who has transitioned from the prime days of record-breaking achievement to an athlete who, with maturity, coaches, writes, and reaches out with shared skills?

What of the senior executive who mentors and the musician whose tone becomes deeply resonant? What of the model who turns to design, the performer who directs, the parents who grandparent?

Is any of this less? Perhaps the transition itself is the learning curve to land experience as something useful rather than degenerative.

And yet, though Past Peak may Still be Beautiful, there is a demand for strength and energy.

In the world of health and fitness, we teach that as our bodies age, the absolute priority is muscular strength to enhance bone health and joint stabilization, mobility and balance.

Quite a few experts have quite a lot to say about this subject. Here are a few resources if you’re so inclined.

In the following podcast, Dr. Gabrielle Lyons makes no bones about it (pardon the pun) – strength training, cardiovascular exercise and HIIT (high intensity interval training) are a must!  (She is also an advocate of substantial amounts of protein but I won’t touch a nutritional topic – so many options to be suggested!) https://drchatterjee.com/the-critical-importance-of-strength-training-and-eating-more-protein-with-dr-gabrielle-lyon/

Arthur C. Brooks is a popular author whose latest book is From Strength to Strength, Finding Success, Happiness and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life. I’m taking my time with this one as there are gems on each, page. You might also enjoy this podcast conversation of Brooks with Rich Roll:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XE0giQ4znNw

From the get-go Brooks is encouraging. Using science, experience, research and logic he proposes that the beautiful mind of a younger person utilizes “fluid intelligence” and later, mature folks use “chrystalized intelligence.” To tease you I will share his quote from British psychologist, Raymond Cattell:  “When  you are young, you have raw smarts; when you are old, you have wisdom. When you are young, you can generate lots of facts; when you are old, you know what they mean and how to use them.” (Is your interest piqued?)

I also love the way Brooks connects physical, mental and spiritual fitness. He, himself, has a practice that is significant and actionable. He advocates clearly defining one’s moral values, daily meditation and daily reading something by a great thinker, words of wisdom.

Within the principles of the Five Element Theory of Traditional Chinese Medicine, we have fully entered the time of year associated with the Metal Element and find ourselves involved with the process of refining, honoring wisdom and self-knowledge. (Past Peak but Still Beautiful?) As Gail Reichstein writes in her excellent book, Wood Becomes Water, Chinese Medicine in Everyday Life, the emotion associated with this time of year is grief. “Grief also teaches us what we value in our lives and in the lives of others, giving us the opportunity to redirect our energies toward becoming who we most want to be.”

Further study reveals that Metal represent both the seeking and that which is found. Coincidental to Brooks and Cattell, Reichstein writes that “the soul of Metal is wisdom …Wisdom turns experience into understanding, allowing us to know more about the present because of what we have learned from the past.” She further states that “The soul of Metal also creates teachers; those who pass their wisdom on to others.”  I think everyone is on the same page!

Continuity. A circle. As green leaves become vibrant with reds, yellows and oranges creating a spectacular vista, they then fall to the ground to become nourishment for future growth. But even in their transition, there is beauty. There is a time and place for value, opportunity, energies and self-actualization. There are lessons to be absorbed simply by sharing breath and space and light, by walking through the calendar year with the natural world as our habitat and companion. And, when we are “Past Peak, it is Still Beautiful.”

From Strength to Strength, by Arthur C. Brooks, Penguin Random House, 2022.

Wood Becomes Water, by Gail Reichstein, Kodansha America, 1998.

THE FOURTH OF JULY 2022

Mt Abe Summit 2022

Happy Fourth of July. This morning I celebrated the day by hiking, with my fabulous Sophie, to summit nearby Mt Abe, appropriately named for President Abraham Lincoln. As I walked the beautiful trails and climbed the challenging rocks and ledges, I was often deep In thought about the significance of this day – in history and today. Coincidentally I have only a few pages left to read in Courage is Calling by Ryan Holiday, and my mind wandered to what I have been reading and learning. Politically right, left or center, we all have opportunities to wring our hands in dismay these days. But it was when a young adult told me she could not in good faith celebrate our country on this day, I was challenged to find ways in which I could do so. Perverse? Perhaps, but I’m usually up for a challenge.

So I will suggest the same to each of you, my friends. Has there ever been a time in history when someone somewhere wasn’t afraid for his or her country? Do we think Abe had it any easier? My daughter’s favorite history teacher taught what she dubbed the “spiral theory of history.” So it seems. If all we do is wring our hands, complain, or sit it out, Ryan Holiday would have some words of advice for us – strong words paraphrased from The Stoics.

So today I celebrate my family and my community. I celebrate those who have the courage to question; those who define their beliefs and values and then stand up for them. I celebrate those who reach out to the less fortunate and I celebrate those who put words into action. I celebrate those who refuse to simply accept, “it is what it is.” Furthermore, I celebrate those who do so without violence.

As I continued to make my way deliberately (that’s another word for slowly!) up the roughly 2,000’ climb, I found snippets of thought passing through my mind to support my celebratory experience. And so, I am able to wish you and yours a Happy Fourth of July.

Bring on the fireworks!

Fireworks

STEP OUTSIDE FOR A DOSE OF LIFE

Seen through the lens of spring. lf

Today, late May, 2022, here in Vermont, the outdoors is making a spectacle of itself. Myriad shades of green are flourishing, dark brown earth is cracking open as seedlings pop through. Brooks and streams are flowing, days are lengthening, lilacs and other blossoms scent the air and animals of all species are up and about. We need only step outside for a dose of life.

GERTRUDE

Tragically there is also an elephant in the room. Meet Gertrude. My granddaughter named her when we addressed “the elephant in the room” a few months back. Here she is again. First, this is a somber weekend celebrating Memorial Day. Then, recent, horrific tragedies here in the United States have broken our hearts. There is much being written and spoken about compassion – how we desperately need to experience compassion for ourselves and for others, how we need to transcend pity and practice compassion as action. Step outside for a dose of compassion?

Indoors, we are surrounded by boundaries. At times we build floors and ceilings and walls in our thinking as well. Sometimes those internal, mental structures are related to the physical space in which we live and move and eat and sleep and breathe. In a sense, we are our own contractors. In a sense we strive to create conflicting elements of comfort and security, beauty and functionality, wealth and simplicity. Perhaps there is a fine line between what imprisons and what sets us free.

Who knows where the trail may lead? lf

Outdoors, square footage becomes environment and personal space spills into the universe.

Being outside is not always lovely. There are bugs and creepy crawly things in the summer and cold and ice in the winter. There are scary things like forest fires and floods and ice storms. But there are also innumerable, and often undefinable, glimpses of life itself.

Have you heard of Forest Bathing? It’s a real thing. Originating in Japan, it’s been around for awhile and is promoted as an antidote to stress. (You can do the research on this one; I have other things to share with your right now.)

Nearly hidden. lf

To be honest, I was not a huge fan of being outside until recently, thanks to my chocolate Lab. I had been a city girl living in Baltimore and Manhattan. (Can’t get much more city than that, right?) Later I participated in outdoor activities, but as soon as they were done, I headed inside rather quickly. All that changed when Sophie needed time outdoors often and every day. No matter how much I complain, once outdoors, I am happy. On my walks with her I am mindful of where I step, what I am brushing up against, what is happening overhead, the feel of the air on my skin and the abundant sounds – all there for the noticing, if I’ll just notice.

And there are stories. So many stories. The world around us is sharing story after story. In the winter, the predawn sky is breathtaking, hinting of the hours to follow. In the summer, the sunset draws the curtain on another long and glorious day – of what? Memories?

Mrs. Snap on my patio. lf

Perhaps this turtle has a story to tell or is looking for a place to lay her eggs. (not on my patio, if you please, Mrs. Snap)

Sunbathing or curious? lf

Perhaps this chipmunk is dreaming of riding a Peloton like mine. (as I was doing when I took this pic.)

Rose-breasted Grosbeak JH

Perhaps a bird is looking for a new eating establishment or a raccoon is reacting to sounds nearby.

Yes, meditation might take place on a cushion, but mindfulness can happen anywhere. Just a few minutes to focus our mental camera on a close up or panorama, just a few minutes to hear leaves rustle or  birds sing, just a few minutes to breathe in clean air and exhale what is stuck inside us, just a few minutes….

Ready to Bolt!  JH

(And yes, I am writing this from Vermont. I am no stranger to city life as I mentioned above so those thoughts are for another day. I can share with you though that I am well aware of the privilege of being able to walk outdoors in safety, removed from most crime and in a clean environment.)

So much of what we do is practice. We do it again and again to establish a habit, improve a technique, gain insight or become more familiar or comfortable with a concept, a value or a belief. Therefore, I encourage us each to pack up our mental camera, leave behind our digital devices, and step outside for a dose of life. But be careful. If you practice this repeatedly, you just may establish a new and lasting habit!

MAMA BEAR and other notes


Mama Bear borrowed from donnaashworth.com

Recently I was called a Mama Bear. I’ll take it. I was in a meeting with a professional, my daughter and son-in-law. At one point, quite unexpectedly and out of character, I flared with outrage and strong, protective language at the way my children were being treated. (I believe it stunned my daughter, but I’m sure I heard my son-in-law cheering in the background of our Zoom call!) I don’t really know how this landed because I needed to excuse myself from the call, but was later teased as their Mama Bear. Again, I’ll take it.

Bears. What do they mean to you? Do you have bears in your life – figuratively or literally? I certainly do. 

The Green Mountain National Forest, and more specifically the Camel’s Hump State Forest, are just outside my door. It is therefore no surprise that black bears, who find this an ideal setting in which to live, breed and raise their young, are my next-door neighbors.  For the most part, they are good neighbors. They have yet to knock on my door, but they have walked within yards of my home. They keep going, though, as there is nothing to tempt them and, if she notices, my chocolate Lab, Sophie, will make quite a fuss.

In fact, it is Sophie about whom I worry the most. Her habit is consistent; her bear-sighting behavior is always the same. First there is that bear barking – it is unique to bear sightings and I know immediately what’s up.  In the car she will turn circles barking all the time and I know to look roadside for a bear.  Off leash, she will dart in the direction of the bear – but run in very large circles around it until it trees.  She will then return to me begging to show me what she has done. No thank you. Let’s walk quietly and steadily home! [Note: I avoid the woods in the spring when the babies are very young and stick to the dirt roads. I also leash her for much of our travels. A bear and dog dispute is not something I want to incite or witness.]

But let me go back to some of what I have learned. First of all, here in Vermont, we have BLACK bears. I first learned this a few years ago. I was hiking a 4000’ trail in New Hampshire on a day when there were very few cars parked on the lot below so allowed Sophie to hike off leash. At one point she ran just ahead of me, around a sharp turn, and I heard a voice shout – “OH (expletive-expletive)! If this is a bear, I’m dead!” (Note, Sophie is effusive in her greetings.) Within seconds several other young male voices laughed and teased the first male and began to play with Sophie. One reminded him that if, in fact, this had been a brown bear, he would be dead.

So, what’s the difference? I learned from my brother that Brown bears come in two sizes – very, very large (the kind you see on videos scooping up salmon; in Alaska they’re Kodiaks) and Grizzlys, considered a subspecies of the Brown bear. I prefer to meet up with neither. We normally associate Brown bears with the western part of the U.S.

Last year there was a video (that went viral) of a Mama Bear in New England doing her best to usher her cubs across two lanes of stopped traffic. It was endearing. However, it is perhaps best that Mama Bear was only frustrated by her young and not by the spectators. Human parents with multiple babies could certainly relate. In fact, for us human parents, the Mama Bear instincts are not only understandable and relatable, but also to be respected.

Which brings me back to my Mama Bear story. In 2000, I found myself unexpectedly single and in Santa Fe with my daughter who had just graduated from high school. It was meant to be a family celebration but became something much different. With my daughter’s help, I connected with the strength that I would need to go forward and recognized that the small, stone bear I purchased had special significance for me and for the years ahead. In Native American tradition, bears symbolize physical strength, leadership and are known as the “first helper.” Bear paws are a symbol representing inner strength. My new little figurine of a Zuni bear signifies The Guardian of the Earth. A heart-line arrow going from head to heart symbolizes a warrior’s heart, strong like the bear’s. If no longer a wife, I would be forever a Mama Bear. Today my bear sits on my desk next to my computer monitor. It has traveled many miles and through many situations since the year 2000.

And then I became fearful of bears. I thought I could avoid hiking trails with signs warning of bears, but they are everywhere. I was not fearful for myself, but for my dog. However, as she matures and as I begin to connect more with Mama Bear, I am more respectful than afraid. Yes, I realize something could trigger a bear’s reaction or there could be a rogue bear out there somewhere, but for the most part, it is best to coexist peacefully and give them space. Oh that we could do that as humans, right?

It is April as I write this. I have learned that cubs are not unlike puppies, born about 8” long and weigh 8-12 ounces. By the time they emerge from their dens they are only 4-8 pounds but are able to follow their mother around. It is no surprise, therefore that Mama Bear is protective. I have also learned that Mama and babies will most likely remain in their habitat above me and away from civilization for a few months yet. Though there is controversy over their habit of hibernation or denning up, it seems that our bears might appear randomly throughout the season if the ‘climate changes’ warm up enough to tempt them outdoors. In fact, during a thaw in February this year, to my great surprise, Sophie treed a young bear (probably 1-2 years old) who had ventured outside his winter home apparently alone.

I return to the Mama Bear identity one last time. Perusing the internet I found one statement in an ad for what was dubbed a Mama Bear fleece, that stated: “tough mamas maximize every day.” I also landed on this: “The real definition: A mama bear is a mama with boundaries. A woman who parents the best way she can, for her child, and a woman who doesn’t apologize for her choices. A mama bear is a woman who asserts herself in any way as a parent. She says ‘no’”.  Mama Bear. I’ll take it.https://abigailgranner.com/2020/11/01/what-mama-bear-really-means/

*********************************************************************************

Note: I take issue with this survey of black bears in Vermont! The bears in my neighborhood stroll, unconcerned, across patios and along country roads. By later in the summer, when readily available food in the woods is not so readily available, “our” bears have no problem searching dumpsters, around outdoor grills and even through an open door if they happen upon one.  However, I do live in a region where bears find a natural habitat.  https://vtfishandwildlife.com/learn-more/vermont-critters/mammals/black-bear

However, note that a more recent notice mandates bear boxes and other bear prevention practices for hikers on the Long Trail. Bears are proliferating and are savvy. They know that hikers bring food. Hopefully they do not leave food.

https://www.greenmountainclub.org/hiking/wildlife/

This is a fascinating report on bears that you might want to take a few minutes to read:  https://www.nps.gov/yell/learn/nature/denning.htm

SNACKS* IN 2021

May 2021

Snacking is good. Well, let me qualify this at the start – I am NOT talking about food.  (Yes, I confess, I jumped on the eat-something-small-every-four-hour bandwagon years ago when grazing was first promoted – about the same time carbs for athletes was being touted. My how things change!  I have definitely jumped off that wagon! So much new science – IF and Timed Eating ….) However, there is another way to embrace snacking and I do so.

The concept of snacking overrules ambitious grand schemes for study, practice, health … and the list goes on and on. I first heard this term used a few months ago referencing adding a walking program to a sedentary person’s life. Presumably sparked by a noble New Years resolution, a couch potato sought advice on how to jump into a schedule. Rather than suggest an idealistic goal of 30, 45, 60 or more minutes a day (in one exercise session) or an unattainable mileage goal, the response was to make snacking a habit. To embrace the habit would be more valuable than scoring high numbers of minutes, steps or miles. In other words, snack on your new habit and walk whenever possible – maybe just 2 minutes to go up the steps, or 5 minutes to the mailbox, or 7-10 minutes around the house, or …. You get the idea. BUT indulge on these snacks frequently. Maybe every hour. Add them up at the end of the day and perhaps the achievement would be as much as or more than the initial but daunting goal of a huge block. The key, of course, is to DO it, to make it a habit that will be repeated daily.

Personal Fav = Peloton:)

(of course, this is not a new concept but perhaps bears repeating or reframing – and of course your Fitbit or Apple Watch or whatever app you might love will do the same thing – just reframing)

Recently I have been enjoying an eclectic selection of podcasts. My current favorites are from Functional Medicine doctors Mark Hyman and Rangan Chatterjee. I know, I’ve mentioned them before, but their interviews are so very thought-provoking. I especially love that Dr. Chatterjee (has an awesome accent but …) concludes his lengthier interviews by asking his expert to sum up with just 4 or 5 actionable tips for the listener to walk away with. Snacks, I think.

a close up is a snack!

Today I was listening to Arianna Huffington talk about “micro habits,” bits and pieces of actionable practices in keeping with the concept of snacks. Perhaps it is the inclusion of  5 minutes of gratitude, or 10 minutes of stillness, or 2 full minutes of breath observation, or reaching out to help one person, or pausing to acknowledge one thing each did well this day.

There are huge obstacles to overcome in each individual’s life. Or perhaps it is more likely that there are huge obstacles to work with and be shaped by, learn from, and move on. After all, Augusten Burroughs says something along the lines of: “I, myself, am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”  (how much do you love that?!)

It is also said that pain is the agent of change. Without disturbance, one might become captive to a shrinking comfort zone. And to borrow from another of Chatterjee’s guests, is one a performer on life’s stage or does one live one’s own unique, exquisitely individual and complex life?

You see, podcasts, essays, blog posts, conversations, and even fortune cookies might offer a sentence or two to take away and chew on as a snack.

Note: an endurance athlete might need a 7-course dinner, not a snack. Snacking is for habit building, for waking up that which might be dormant or for maintaining the forward moving inertia that one has worked hard to put in motion. Snacking fits into the spaces created by life when life gets real and necessary and very demanding. Doing nothing is not an option. Physical activity, mental stimulation, and yes, even pockets of silliness are snacks that sustain and nourish us.

For example: Do not send the kids outside to play – go out with them – at least for a snack. Do not put the dog in the yard and clean up later; take the dog for a walk even if it is frustrating to accommodate the dog’s busy nose as spring scents entice. Stuck on Zoom? Stand up, stretch, pick your knees up, kick your butt, do those infamous six positions of the spine, then see if your stretching snack gave you a pick up. Stress steam-rollering you? Close your mental door and slip behind your eyelids for a moment of stillness, your own personal pause in a world where chaos reigns if you allow it. Brows furrowed? Take a minute or three to thumb through your adolescent kid’s favorite lame joke book. You will laugh, I guarantee it. (If not, you need more than a snack!)

In my teaching and coaching I often encourage students and clients to try to do less but do it more efficiently and achieve the same or greater results. Years ago, before I learned what I know now, I would quip: turn your tension into energy. Yes, well, why not? Stress, striving, pushing, forcing, tend to shut down the flow of energy within and without the body causing pain instead of power. Allow the energy to flow freely and in concert with your inner and outer strength and you will find that which you could only imagine, redefining limitless goals.

Balance, of course, is key. All snacks won’t work forever but will always have a place in one’s daily habits. Constantly shuffling the deck of fitness and wellness components helps sustain equilibrium. Exercise, healthy nutrition, hydration, and sleep are vital. Exercise itself has many pieces: aerobic, strength, power, quickness and mobility/stability training. Nutrition is as varied as the consumer and needs to be studied and tested carefully avoiding extremes. Meditation, Yoga, Pilates, Barre, Qi Gong, and, of course, Peloton, offer plentiful snacks or main courses.

So, what does one ever wait for? You can do this. You can creatively space snacks throughout your day and teach your body, mind and spirit to live life more fully. Expect this of yourself and your expectations will be fulfilled. Engage others in your habits.

SNACKS TO SHARE

PAUSE or PAWS

  • First thing in the morning, take a few minutes to look outside. Even better, take an early morning walk. (if you have a dog, this is a no-brainer)
  • Clear head space before bed and when first awakening as a non-digital time zone. In other words, don’t take your phone to bed with you and when you open your eyes in the morning avoid reaching for it. Deliberately wait to do so until after your first cup of coffee?
  • Adopt the habit to PAUSE. Stop the rush, halt the wave of anxiety in its tracks, seal your lips before saying the four-letter-word busy, or look at your plate of food before diving in.

    PAUSE or PAWS

    PAUSE. Maybe for a moment of gratitude. Maybe for a breath. Maybe just to reorganize your intention for the next step.

    OK, don’t remember where I got these but I wrote them down to share with you:

  • Replace anxiety with curiosity.
  • Gratitude is the antidote to ruminating.
  • Rather than gulping (breath, water, etc) try sipping.
  • And this may be my favorite – before entering your next Zoom meeting, check your face to replace your frown with a smile!
  • And finally, note what others may have done for us. Perhaps a friend has offered time to simply listen or has reached out with a text message just to say hello. Stop to recognize this gift and then pay it forward.

Snacks, little manageable bits, are seeds that, once planted in fertile acceptance, provide unimaginable opportunities for organic growth. And don’t forget to share your snacks!

 

*Disclaimer. True confession – no, I did not know that teenagers use the word snack to refer to someone they might find attractive – usually sexy. I do not have a teenager in my house. Yet.

APRIL IS A PERFECT MONTH

Move forward with optimism, positivity and energy but be alert for tricks and trip-ups along the way. Am I talking about life? About trail running? About business? About spirituality?

Actually, what prompts this post is an offhand comment I made this morning when I said “April is a perfect month.” Then, as so often happens, I wonder why I said that and have been thinking about it all day. So, here I am at my computer and asking you for your thoughts as well.

Look. Any month that begins with April Fool’s Day can’t be burdensome or serous. One source describes the month as capricious. I like that word, don’t you? Sounds like a bit of fun.

I don’t know about you, but I think one of the best parts of anything wonderful is the anticipation. When we were kids, we would approach a birthday with such high anticipation and then crumble on the other side when it became history. Looking forward to a celebration, outing, trip (we’ll get there again; be patient) or athletic pursuit is often more exciting and perhaps even more profound than the event itself and perhaps that which underpins what ultimately become memories.

“April showers bring May flowers.” Yes, well, perhaps not in New England, but we do seem to be able to garden earlier each year. It seems that the word April comes from a Latin word that means to open. That makes sense. And then there’s the thought that the month is named after the goddess Aphrodite. Diamonds and daisies, blue skies and yellow daffodils, longer days and maybe shorts. Even Shakespeare adds to the clout of April when he says: “April hath put a spirit of youth in everything.” (Sonnet XCVIII) What’s not to love?

And another thing – some note that April is about moving forward. We are leaving cold and mud behind and heading into what, for some of us, is our favorite season. Again, anticipation is to be valued. Each year, to my utter surprise, I realize (sometime in July) that the Summer Solstice has come and gone and that the days are, indeed, getting shorter. Here I am, mid-summer, expecting the daylight to go on and on. But now, here in April, we can look forward to the lengthening of each day for another 2+ months. What a gift!

We do not wait; we move and we move forward. We spring clean, we detox, and we even take another look at our diet/budget twins. We pack away our winter clothes, comforters and skis as we happily unpack lighter wear, bicycles and running shoes.

If we pause, and take a really good look at what we see and how we feel, we may note that we see the opening up – not just of our community following long months of pandemic restrictions – but the opening up of our expectations, hopes and plans. We open our windows and we open our hearts. We inhale fresh air and exhale doubt; inhale boldness and exhale timidity; inhale possibilities and exhale fear; inhale generosity and exhale parsimony.

April is, after all, a month of contradictions that entice us forward with a spring in our steps and hold us back with an unexpected snowfall. April is about the beginning of the kind of inertia that consistently moves onward, not the stodgy old stagnant inertia deeply sloppy mud season.

As soon as the ice melts, jump in!

And though April keeps us guessing, it also encourages the pursuit of equilibrium. We are reminded that things don’t just happen, but that we must seek them. We must seek our own balance, generate our own energy and invite the Yin in our lives to integrate, not compete, with the Yang.

So yes, I think April is a perfect month. It is a month of excitement, renewal and delicate beauty.

If, however, you want more, just be sure to find your own way to celebrate the full Pink Moon on the 26th. Based on previous moons, this one is special, one of only two supermoons of 2021. Look forward, make a plan, execute your plan, and step out in full awareness of what this month has to offer. It is, indeed, perfect.

THRESHOLDS BETWEEN BUSYNESS AND SELFCARE

Though a threshold often mark the start, the beginning or an entrance, perhaps a threshold also marks transition and connection. Recently I had removed a partition between living rooms in my house and another room designated as my home gym. A threshold was installed to make the transition from one room to the other safer, easier and more attractive. Yes, it is a physical piece of wood, but it is also a metaphorical threshold that invites and welcomes me when I enter my gym space to take some time for myself to ride my Peloton or lift weights or step on my Bosu. threshold gives me permission to use the room as intended and encourages dedication to my training. When I finish, I can almost hear my threshold saying “Well done!” as I cross back into my daily life.

Today on my walk I paused to look across a country road to two wonderful old draft horses with nothing more to do than swish off flies and pass the time away. The low stone wall separating them from the road and beyond was more of a visual boundary than an actual restraint as they could easily have made their way over it if they had wanted. Likewise, I could have joined them in about 3 strides. But from what – respect? – it seems we all bowed to the appropriate separation and continued on our way. Does threshold represent boundary or freedom?

As some of you know, over the past months of Covid related changes, I have stolen more time to read and have done a deep dive into the works of John O’Donohue. If ever there is a writer who tackles the concept of “threshold,” it’s O’Donohue, and I urge you to make his acquaintance.  He often speaks of duality, opposition and the striving for balance. “Duality, then, is informed by the oppositions that meet at this threshold. I would argue that an authentic life is a life that is aware of and willing to engage its own oppositions, and honorably inhabits that threshold where the light and darkness, the masculine and feminine and all the beginnings and endings of one’s life engage.” (Walking in Wonder by John O’Donohue, Convergent press, 2015)

As a Yoga instructor and practitioner, I am in love with Yoga itself, the physical strength, mobility and stability benefits, and the mind-body connection. In my teaching I encourage all to balance the Yin and Yang in their Yoga practice, sports performance, daily life, etc and to become aware that these are not competing forces, but necessary opposites that integrate, support and find equilibrium in us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

“Genuine spiritual practice offers a way to face both our inner and outer worlds and to bring these two related realms into living, loving dialogue.” (from tricycle.org; Gaylon Ferguson, “Natural Bravery”)

I did hear a few complaints of boredom after the lockdowns of spring. For the most part we found ourselves busier than ever sourcing food and supplies, learning coping mechanisms and how to protect our families, teaching our kids, and for so many businesses, how to remain viable when all but essential workers showed up via Zoom or other internet platforms.

Busyness has taken on new meaning. So has selfcare. There was a time when selfcare was for the individual with abundant funds and time to spend at the spa. No longer. Now we honor the concept. Selfcare precedes care of others and without it reserves of generosity and service empty too quickly. Selfcare underpins effective action and softens the edges of tolerance. Selfcare multiplies patience and gives value to connection.

And just how does threshold play a part in all of this? There is all too often an inherent resistance to selfcare. Perhaps there is a mental boundary keeping us from doing for ourselves, investing in stress relief or strength and energy production. Maybe, just maybe, that boundary could be observed as a threshold – a line between time or space, to be sure, but a line that encourages  transition to cross it. Like the stone wall separating the horses from the road, that line just maybe will discourage anything that might devalue or intrude upon our time of selfcare.

At the beginning of each day, as we cross the threshold from sleep to wakefulness, may we do so knowing that at some point when we need it most, we will step over another threshold into that which will renew, settle and free the flow of energy and goodness within us so that we may begin again to reach out to those in our lives and do whatever needs to be done. May your personal threshold say “Well Done!”

Seasonal changes offer nature’s threshold into what is to come.

The Coronavirus – Friday the 13th Or The New Normal, March 2020

Vermont

March 2020 will be remembered. And not nicely. Perhaps it was on Friday the 13th that you and I, living comfortably in the United States (note, I speak and write from Vermont which is not representative of the US as a whole) first accepted the reality of the Coronavirus pandemic.*

me time

Unfortunately, Friday the 13th has been dusted off and redefined. Some of you, of course, had been prescient, or at least paying attention, and had been stocking up on food and emergency supplies. Others were reluctant – even a few who continue to doubt and insist on throwing the flu into the mix. Be that as it may, as I write this, we are beginning week 3 of The New Normal and I am compelled to keep my blog posts alive. So here goes.

To all those who are deemed ESSENTIAL, thank you. The Big Picture is not pretty. I don’t know about you, but I find it heart-wrenching to consider those unable to be with a loved one who is terminally ill; or to be that loved one dying alone; or to worry about keeping one’s family safe and fed, and wonder just how far one can hold out on limited resources. Dire indeed. For generations to come acts of generosity and selflessness will be passed from parent to child. We watch press conferences and see our State and Local leaders working on our behalf and looking exhausted. And we realize that community is not a geographical designation.

To those of us who are NON-ESSENTIAL, well, I guess it’s nice to know! The Big Picture is one thing but the Thumbnail is also compelling.  I can walk out my door and into the woods without seeing another person. How on earth do people manage exile within their own homes or to be living in an apartment dwelling with multiple floors separating their room(s) from ground level.

hiding won’t help

Screen time is UP. My guess is that after the initial binge-watching of Netflix, much of screen time is spent on news and connection. It is, after all, a time to reach out to an ever-expanding virtual community and know that we are not alone. One can only hope that our internet infrastructure will hold up. It is mind-blowing to see so much activity – from educational to professional, meetings to Yoga, how to cook, how to decorate, how to fill your time – that is, if you have time, and how about reconnecting with your college roommate, your grandparents who live on the other side of the country, your former clients/neighbors…. It just goes on and on. It’s amazing what happens when pushed to the wall – Facebook, Instagram, FaceTime, Zoom – even the at-risk seniors are having at it.

And then there’s WFH. Admittedly when I first saw WFH I thought WTF? Not to worry. It’s Work From Home of course, or working remotely to some of us. Do you have new respect for those who WFH? I do. It’s so hard. Of course there are the obvious: distractions, motivation, time management, skill, etc.  Oh, and you can go to work in your pjs. There’s that. But for far too many WFH is more stressful and more demanding. It is like being on call 24/7 or working under the expectation of producing more than is possible in a given amount of time. Kudos to those who are doing this. (and please – the new normal courtesy is to not bother these folks with texts, emails or pings as they really do have deadlines and are not just sitting at their computers hoping to have some fun)

Somewhere in between Essential and Non-essential, between Big Picture and Thumbnail is the issue of PARENTING.  Kids are resilient. What about their folks?

And what about the unthinkables – the homeless, the accident victims, the mentally ill, the prisoners, babies waiting to be born, patients needing chemo, morticians. What about those who are keeping watch over our faith, finances, safety, even our groceries, and, heaven help us, government? Unthinkable, yes?

Get outside – anywhere and whenever you can – distancing of course.

Go figure. Maybe this got real on Friday the 13th but guess what lies just ahead – yup, April Fool’s Day. So, let’s see if we can be better prepared for this one. 

  • As we transition from the real to the virtual world, may we not grow roots into our chairs.
  • May we find routines in each day and balance randomness with structure.
  • May we continue to work with our calendars or datebooks or to-do lists and commit to them small but achievable daily goals.
  • May we remember which day it is.
  • May we journal. Who knows, it might become a best seller at a later epoch.
  • May we embrace distraction. You know that me-time that we’re always told to find? Well, if we’re finding it and clinging to silence or solitude or stillness or something equally esoteric, and the phone rings or a text announces itself or the dog brings us a toy or a kid shouts out “Mom” as only a kid can shout, hey! Embrace that. Isn’t it nice to know that we are NOT alone and that someone wants us?
  • May we be grateful for what we have and may that count for more than what we don’t have.
  • May we be strong and healthy and kind.
  • And may we not fall for any April Fool jokes this year.

*CDC.gov defines pandemic (not a word we’ve considered much) as: “… a global outbreak of disease. Pandemics happen when a new virus emerges to infect people and can spread between people sustainably. Because there is little to no pre-existing immunity against the new virus, it spreads worldwide.”  (emphasis supplied as to me this is what makes it so scary – how much mutation is there about which we are clueless and will remain uninformed?)

JANUARY THAW 2020

The concept of THAW is pretty simple: what is hard or frozen softens or liquifies in the presence of warmth. When THAW = MELT one can explore myriad possibilities and implications – physically, mentally and emotionally.

When the thermometer rises, the winds blow and the rain pounds down in Northern New England, plans change abruptly to include flood warnings, power outages and just plain disappointment. As I write this, it is January 11 and there is, of course, the notion that this is simply our “January thaw” for this year. On the other hand, with all the horrific weather events that we’re (almost) getting used to, and the fact that this is, what, our 6th thaw this winter (?), is this alarming? At best, though it gives us pause. In spite of the ever-present threat of the possibility of damage or danger caused by irresistible forces of nature, there is relief from biting cold and an almost playful tease in the air. (60 degrees? Really?!)

Yes, our snow sports, and by extension, our winter recreational industries, take a hit. Alpine trails are at the mercy of lifts shut down on wind-hold, deadly dangerous ice and nearly as dangerous slush. Kids and young athletes wring their un-gloved hands in distress when they hear that their early races have been cancelled. Nordic ski areas suffer the melting of meticulously groomed tracks, ponds transition to off-limit, VAST trails reduce to dirt, and even wooded walks require a strange mixture of waterproof boots and microspikes to slog through varied conditions.

Perhaps there’s a good side to all this. For one thing, we do so appreciate the vividly clear winter day when there is nothing more beautiful than sunshine on clean white snow. The flip side is always bleak, muddy and messy.  But isn’t life like this?

Today, while Sophie, my Chocolate Lab, and I took an unusually long time to travel an unusually short distance trudging our usual trails, I had plenty of time to laugh at her as she found opportunity to make a game out of just about everything. I also pondered the word THAW. Playing with shades of significance is an organic game. Toss a pebble (word) into a pond (mind) and watch the ripples (ideas) flow and expand.

To look on the dark side, thawing represents loss. To look on the bright side, thawing suggests softening, warming, even reshaping. Perhaps a thaw is a reminder of impermanence.

And then there’s the notion of melting. Yoga practitioners are familiar with Anahatasana, that wonderfully delicious heart-melting pose. After several minutes settling into this posture, the pose informs the body and the body informs the heart – it is good, it is safe, it is worthy to open, to be receptive, to love and be loved.

From the wisdom learned and shared by those who have come before us throughout generations, centuries, millennia, and previous to that, we embrace the balance of power and peace, strength and flexibility, masculine and feminine, Yang and Yin. We learn that softening the rough edges of aggression and force does not necessarily dilute strength. We hear the suggestion that melting the heart to practice tolerance and empathy does not, in turn, open us to vulnerability. We hope to melt debilitating tension to a form of useful energy. We recognize action as positive and, likewise, that passive does not mean weak, lazy or ineffective, but rather, thoughtful, generous and enduring.

A Yoga class is often ended with “OM” or a metta – a heart opening practice of loving kindness expressed to self and to others. In closing, I open my heart to you: “May you feel protected and safe. May you feel contented and pleased. May your body support you with strength. May your life unfold smoothly and with ease.” Happy January Thaw!

SEASONS’ GREETINGS. What does that actually mean?

Seasons’ Greetings. What does that actually mean? How does the season in which you navigate through your days affect your body, mind and spirit? And what in the world is going on? I shared the following on FB recently but can’t get it out of my head – actually not a bad thing – so am sharing it again:

“Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally. The broken world waits in darkness for the light that is you.” (Gratefullness.org)

This particular December is packed with overlapping seasonal dates. As I write this, Winter Solstice has happened and now, thankfully, the short days are magically lengthening, even if by small increments. On the 21st I joined family and friends around a blazing bonfire with starry sky overhead and darkly lit woods behind. What a way to greet the solstice!

At one time I was warmly welcomed into a community that celebrated Hanukkah with devotion and enthusiasm. December 22nd, Hanukkah begins, a tradition I continue to respect and honor. December 24 is Christmas Eve, a day that means different things to different people.

I treasure this tiny Nativity (not 2″ high) carried home in a backpack by my daughter whose first semester abroad was spent in France, returning home just in time to celebrate Christmas.

As a child, Christmas Eve meant staying awake for a midnight church service and returning home to the tree where I was allowed to open one present before going to bed. As a parent the Eve of Christmas morning meant waiting until the kids were asleep and then staying up most of the night putting things together or stealthily suggesting that Santa had arrived with more stuff than could possibly fit down the chimney. And, of course, as a Christian, paying homage to the origins of the holy day.

Now, with adult children, Christmas Day is rich with significance. Refusing to let one sad thought enter my mind, I dredge up delightful memories and plunge headlong into sleepovers with my grandkids and fun-filled activities with my big kids. (always allowing them to do the cooking – I continue to hate to cook!)

Then on the 26th there’s Kwanzaa. Frankly, I know little about this holiday but feel deeply about multiculturalism, diversity and the unification of the many who live in our country.

But I DO know something about December 31st, a day to pull out all sorts of “re” words – resolve, renew, reflect, reorganize, reevaluate, regenerate, reset – please add on as many as you can!

There are two “re” words that have recently been highlighted for me and I share them here.

RECEIVE. As human beings, whether parent, care-giver, teacher, snow remover, sales person, medical care provider, trash hauler, pet sitter, you name it, we give, and we do so according to our personal commitment. Rarely do we allow ourselves to receive. A few weeks ago at a training at Kripalu, in each of the Vinyasa classes I joined, at the final pose, Savasana, we were invited to find stillness and to RECEIVE. Once planted, I have been watching that seed grow and invite you to do the same.

RELATIONSHIP. One of my favorite writers, Eugene Peterson, passed not that long ago. Speaking of his father, one of his son’s suggested that Peterson preached only one message – about RELATIONSHIP. So, I plant yet another seed and watch it grow. I observe relationship continuously. I try to practice relationship from my heart. RELATIONSHIP is a very large word.

So today, perhaps SEASONS’ GREETINGS is, in fact, the appropriate sentiment. I greet you in relationship and wish for you to receive peace, goodness, love.

May 2020 be a year of insight (with 2020 vision?) and action. May it be a year in which we, and those with whom we share this planet, enjoy enough and participate in the care and unity of all.

SEASONS’ GREETINGS, indeed